It’s impossible for me to discuss this film without jumping into spoiler territory straightaway, so…

The following WILL contain spoilers for The Rise of Skywalker!

So, Palps is back. Cool. Except, what..? How…? And mainly… WHAT!?!??!

This is where the new trilogy stumbles for a bit for me. Don’t get me wrong, mainly the ending will probably hit you in the feels, but the two main plot twists of this movie feel rushed and really disjointed from the other two movies.

If this was truly studio’s and J.J.’s goal from the very beginning, why not give us some clues on the way? Why couldn’t we hear the message that was available through… I can’t believe what I’m about to write… Fortnite event (video below for the unaware) half way through the Episode VIII? Or maybe at the very end, just imagine this, before the end, where they have each other and hope, suddenly, we hear Palpatine with this message, credits start to roll. That’d at least establish him being back a bit more, it would give us, the fans, time to make peace with this fact and start talking how and why is he back and it wouldn’t feel as rushed!

Because that’s how The Rise of Skywalker feels like – after the massive divide the previous movie managed to do, it feels like something like this happened at Disney’s headquarters:

Disney’s BigHead: (Sitting angrily behind his desk, with a suspicious white powder mountain in front of him) “Fuck, people are pissed! Quick, who can we bring back to be main villain, especially now since we’ve killed Snoke?“

Young, unpaid intern: (Speaks really sheepishly, almost can’t be heard): “Maybe Palpatine?“

Disney’s BigHead: (Yells, half confused, half excited starts snorting the suspicious white powder mountain:) “WHAT?!“

Young, unpaid intern: (Speaks not as sheepishly anymore): “You know, Palpatine? People seem to like him and last time I’ve checked, Ian McDiarmid is still around.”

Disney’s BigHead: (Continues yelling, while the suspicious white powder mountain in front of him slowly starts disappearing:) “Didn’t we kill him back in 1983? I swear to God, fuck off before I-“

Young, unpaid intern: (Interrupts bravely, voice slightly quivering): “He was the ultimate evil, you know. We can explain it like that. Or that he was a clone, or maybe-“

Disney’s BigHead: (Interrupts intern’s interruption, yelling, the suspicious white powder mountain has completely gone:) “Fuck it, that will have to do, we have a date we need to stick to no matter what! Give me J.J.!“

Just for legality sake, I DO NOT CLAIM THIS HAS ACTUALLY HAPPENED. (One can never be too careful these days).

That’s how the Palpatine revelation felt like to me – and this is why when I re-watched all the Star Wars movie, it struck me that even the prequels, no matter their weaknesses, knew where they are going. This trilogy seems like there was a battle between J.J. Abrams and Rian Johnson and I just wish no matter who’d win, they’d given them the complete control of the entire trilogy.

I’d rather have a trilogy that where:

It also would be great if somebody had actually spent some time on planning and planting clues about potential big bad coming back and also, the fact the main heroine is… his granddaughter.

Yes, let’s talk about Rey being Palpatine’s family. If you make peace with Palps being back, it does make sense, in a really twisted way and also doesn’t undermine any characters from previous 2 movies (like when Kylo Ren told Rey in The Last Jedi her parents were nobody, he was technically right). But again, how cool would it be if we had some breadcrumbs throughout the last two movies, that could’ve led us to this, even without Palpatine being there? How cool would it be if we could re-watch the entire new trilogy now, and pick up on tiny details where we could say “Oh yeah, they WERE setting it up from the very beginning!”

Sometimes it feels like people in charge of big Hollywood studios should only stay in charge for maximum of 5 years, as there seems to be a disconnect between the studios and moviegoers about what constitutes “a great movie”, let alone “a great movie trilogy”. It’s almost like there is a confusion about what people actually enjoy, what people want from movies, and what do the studios think we want/enjoy. We don’t need twists (especially if they don’t make sense, or you need to read a comic book or watch a YouTube video for a video game to understand why is something happening), we don’t need characters, who’ve been dead for almost 40 years in a movie franchise, to come back for one last hurrah! Just hire creative, young(ish) people who haven’t been part of the same company for as long as others, so they can still see things as fans, from fresh perspective and deliver us a great story with beginning, middle and end.

I apologise if this review doesn’t really give you a much about The Rise of Skywalker, but it’s hard for me to talk about why this movie doesn’t connect with me fully, without mentioning its place in this trilogy. Because on its own, I still liked it, very much. It’s still Star Wars, so I do have a soft spot for it, the ending where we see all the ships coming against the First Order gave me chills, Rey fighting Palpatine alone and alongside “turned” Kylo was also great, her hearing all the Jedi’s who now live through her… The pieces are great! The movie as a whole doesn’t work as well I am afraid.

Is this movie bad? I would say no, it’s still worth seeing. Does this movie completes the sequel trilogy? Barely, because it has to. As many people (rightly) pointed out, the first 40 minutes or so feel like a game speed run, where we NEED to get places fast, to propel the plot where we need it, ASAP! But dammit, it still has some great scenes.

That’s all for the last of the “Skywalker Saga”? What did you think? Did you like the way the sage ended? Let me know!

Until next time,

Luke

All the Star Wars movies we’ve had a prior to this one, had one, almost unique attribute – there was a general consensus about each one. Think about it – you can say that on the average, people agree the Empire Strikes Back is the best one, people tend to agree The Phantom Menace is (or now was, I guess) the worst one and everything in between varies, but for the most part, there was an “order” to all the movies prior to this one about where they “belong” quality wise.

Readers beware, there might be some spoilers below!

As with The Force Awakens, I went to see this movie at midnight, day before the official premiere to avoid any spoilers. I remember being so hyped about it, I remember wondering what we will learn about Rey, how her training with Luke will go, you know, the usual stuff. And what I’ve got was something so different, I didn’t know what to think of it for the longest time. And I wasn’t alone in this, not by far. I knew I really liked parts of it, but also wasn’t convinced about the other parts (the entire fuel thing, casino planet), but I knew it was a really solid Star Wars movie, that was beautifully shot (hate it or love, this is the best shot Star Wars movie to date, and that’s a hill I’m willing to die on) and I thought this might not go over well with some people. But I had no idea what was coming over the next couple of weeks, when more and more people were seeing the movie.

There was something that struck nerve with plenty of fans with The Last Jedi, that it quickly became almost 50/50 movie, where one half LOVED it and is willing to defend until they die, and the other half HATED it and considers it the worst thing that happened to Star Wars since… well ever! Alright, without sounding like Donald (you know who I mean) let’s look at this movie and see whether both sides are right.

The Last Jedi is directed by Rian Johnson. If you are familiar with his style, you’d probably know he loves to think of new ways to do basically everything, to subvert everyone’s expectations and that’s what ultimately pissed off (what seems to be) half of the fandom. It almost feels like he didn’t care this should’ve been a middle part of a trilogy, he’s done the movie he wanted, where he tried not to dwell on the past, but forge his own, new way, but still within the laws of the universe. That is if you’re up on your comics, and different Star Wars antiques, where you need to know almost every single detail about the Force for what Leia and Luke do in this movie to make sense. And I think this might be part of the reason why some people got angry – he overestimated majority of Star Wars fans, where for example, I count myself as a big Star Wars fan, but I had no idea you can use the Force to protect yourself in the space and turn into a space Superwoman, or project yourself onto a different planet and still react with the environment.

The other things people tend to complain about when comes to The Last Jedi, is the entire trip to the casino planet where it seems to disrupt the flow of the movie, and the fuel thing, where one ship goes just fast enough so the other, much bigger ship can’t catch up with it…? Really? Also the fact they just killed Snoke without us learning (at least in this episode) who he actually was, made some people really angry. These things are the most talked about negative points and to be fair, I understand why. Especially the fuel thing seems to be slightly silly.

Let’s go over some positives – the entire “red room” battle, where Rey and Kylo join forces for a few minutes and deliver what might very well be the best lightsaber fight of any Star Wars movie, was really well done, shot, executed. My hat is off. The sacrifice the Vice Admiral Holdo (played by Laura Dern) makes where she does something we’ve NEVER seen in any Star Wars movie was also breathtaking (even though, they could’ve just let Poe on their plan, plenty of other issues could’ve been avoided) and the Luke versus Kylo Ren fight at the very end, was great on its own, but the twist… definitely really cool moment too.

I’ve recently re-watched this, for the first time since I’ve seen it in the cinemas, and was hoping it would help me establish where do I stand with this movie (prior to that, I was around 4*). I can definitely say now, without a shadow of a doubt, I belong to the first group of people, where I love the movie, as the things that bothered me too while watching it for the first time (fuel and casino planet mainly) didn’t bother me as much. I’ve watched it alongside my girlfriend (first time for her with all Star Wars movie, was introducing her to all of them) and her immediate reaction after this movie’s finished was “Fucking hell, why would anyone hate this movie?” and I think I know the answer.

I remember after The Force Awakens, the general consensus was “it’s a good movie that sets up plenty of things, let see how they pay off” and then everybody and their dog started to post their own Star Wars predictions, theories, what the next one will be about, every time there was a new trailer, people would pick up on one split second of a random footage and hyped themselves with “This confirms I might be right and we will see this, and this and that!!” and to a certain extent, made up their own “perfect” sequel in their minds before seeing this one. Is there any wonder, that after they’ve watched The Last Jedi, something so drastically different from what they’ve expected, they were not only let down, they were pissed that the movie wasn’t everything they theorised about? And even though I wasn’t pissed about this movie, I felt this too. I was slightly disappointed because it didn’t give me the things I wanted it to. But now, after the second viewing, I’ve let go of what I wanted and tried to accept the movie on its own terms and that’s where I realised it’s actually a great Star Wars movie, that just tried to be different, against all odds. If you think about it, this is exactly what this movie is about – letting the past go, make a new way for new stories and characters.

But this is a typical Star Wars fandom for you – do something ordinary (like a copy of A New Hope) people will tell you “We’ve seen this before, give us something new!” You do something nobody before you even attempted to do in this universe and the same people will now shout at you “No, this is TOO different, make it Star Wars again!” You can’t win. Speaking of Star Wars fandom, let me just talk to the what I hope is a really, really tiny bunch of them, please stop harassing people (mainly woman like Kelly Marie Tran) for being in a movie you don’t like! It’s one thing not to like a movie, it’s completely other thing to be poisonous to the point where she needs to delete her Instagram account (link for this unfortunate news is here).

Back to the movie – as mentioned before, the second viewing really helped me make up my mind. Are there (still) things I might not agree with 100%. Yes. But am I able to enjoy something new, that feels fresh, and be glad about having a really unique and cool looking Star Wars movie? Also 100%. After seeing The Rise of Skywalker my only big gripe with this movie is they could’ve at least hinted at what/who’s coming as the “big bad” in the last one… but more about that tomorrow.

That’s all for the most controversial Star Wars movie to date. What did you think of it? Let me know!

Until next time,

Luke

When Disney bought the Star Wars back in 2012, and everything belonging to it (merchandise rights, story rights, the whole circus) and announced brand new trilogy, I was excited. I am a big Star Wars fan (probably not a surprise by now :-)) so I was looking forward to seeing what will they do with that, couldn’t wait to follow somebody else’s story throughout the galaxy far, far away.

I remember the first trailer coming out and some people having issues with black Stormtrooper (I mean, Jesus, what even say to that?) but I was really hyped for the movie. To the point where I actually had to go to see this during the midnight showing, to avoid any potential spoilers coming my way. Oh yeah, I went above and beyond to make sure I’ve enjoyed this. And I have.

Let’s get the main criticism out of the way – it does feel more “new hopey” than the creators probably intended, not just with yet another Death Star (but wait, it’s totally different now, because it’s called Starkiller Base and it’s like really, really big!!) but plenty of other similarities (growing up not knowing who your parents are, by accident running across a robot who’s got important information etc.) Which didn’t bother me, as it still managed to be its own thing. And there is the “issue” about Rey being Mary Sue… I mean, come on people. There are reasons, why she’s as powerful as she is, especially knowing what we know now, just goes to show we sometimes need to let filmmakers finish the story before judging characters.

About Rey, that’s one thing I’ve noticed re-watching this movie for the first time since my midnight cinema experience – everything she does, she doesn’t do perfectly, she kind of tries and pushes her luck on the things she can/can’t do. I wouldn’t call her Mary Sue, as she’s more scared than anything and tries her luck. And yes, most of the time, she succeeds.

I really liked the main trio, I thought Daisy Ridley took this as a champ and delivered really solid performance, I thought John Boyega served well as the reminder of how dangerous First Order really is, while struggling with himself being trained to kill people, but when push comes to the shove, he couldn’t do it, and I thought Oscar Isaac was good. He didn’t really have that much to do (main reason would be him being fake dead for almost an hour of the movie) but he’s got charisma and he seems to be the best pilot in the galaxy (he says this a lot :-))

What I really liked about The Force Awakens was the fact J.J. Abrams focused mainly on practical effects (where he could) and it felt closer to the original trilogy than the prequels, no debate about that. I’ve also liked the mystery about where’s Luke, who Rey is (even though, now knowing what I know…) and I still think Kylo Ren’s lightsword looks pretty cool (even though it’s not as practical and elegant as a lightsaber).

It’s hard to rate this movie on its own, knowing how different the next two films are and where the story ultimately leads, but let me just say this – this movie is great. J.J. did a great job and for a moment, it seemed like he managed to unite most of the Star Wars fandom… Then, The Last Jedi came… but about that tomorrow 😉

For this one, I don’t have to have “an objective” rating, this is all around well made movie with great cast, action pieces and a bit of mystery.

That’s all for this one? What did you think? Did you like the new trilogy, or did you wish the would leave Star Wars alone? Let me know!

Until next time,

Luke

One thing most Star Wars fans can agree on (even those who hate the prequels) is Revenge of the Sith is objectively the best out of the prequels (but of course, some might add it’s like saying I’d rather have AIDS than cancer). I have showed my hand early (the hand being, Attack of the Clones is my favourite out of this trilogy) but objectively, I have to agree.

Revenge of the Sith is well paced, action packed and surprisingly funny Star Wars movie (definitely the funniest Star Wars movie until the sequels came along). Whether it’s the first rescues mission, Obi-Wan vs General Grievous and his not one(!), not two(!!), not three(!!!) but FOUR (!!!!) lightsabers at the same time, or the final action piece where Obi-Wan goes up against Darth Vader pre metal suit, there sure are plenty of action pieces, where for the most part, they aren’t edited to death, so you should be able to keep up just fine and not wonder where everybody is in relation to each other.

My main problem with this movie is – and this is what I’m trying to get across in all of these prequel reviews – George Lucas wanting to do everything himself. And as I’ve mentioned before, he is a great visionary, he knows what he wants to tell, but he’s not that great with characters or script. Especially when you can see a downfall of a much beloved character throughout the prequels. No, I’m not talking about Anakin, I’m talking about his secret wife, Padmé.

Let’s take a look at her character across this entire trilogy – The Phantom Menace, she’s fearless leader/queen of Naboo, goes wondering on Tatooine with nobody but Qui-Gon, switches herself with her body double several times (btw body double played by young Keira Knightley) throughout the film not thinking about herself, but fighting for her people, and eventually leading an attack on her old palace to take it back from the Federation.

Let’s go to Attack of the Clones – she’s a senator now, therefore in more danger, she goes into hiding with Hayden (that sounds like a 90’s sitcom, Hidin’ with Hayden every Friday only on ABC!) and slowly falls in love with him. But we still see her at the end, kicking some ass in the arena (even though, let’s face it, she should have never survived that place, but you could make an argument Anakin was protecting not only himself, but her for the entire time) and fighting like hell.

In this movie however… she turns into almost a puppy whose sole purpose is to be a mother and therefore turns soft…? Suddenly she’s head over heels, where all she does is planning the future for them as a couple, even though she should know it would be more difficult than that, and cries. I don’t know if George Lucas thinks when women get pregnant, that’s all they are doing, but it seemed her character devolved throughout the trilogy. What a waste of Natalie Portman.

I thought Hayden Christensen got more comfortable with his role, and his performance was much better than the last movie, you can tell how much fun Ewan McGregor is having (I’m really hoping they will do a series on Disney+ with him, I just want more Ewan as Obi-Wan in my life, preferably yesterday) and everything else flows well.

Even the effects hold up today, which can’t be said about different movies from the same era, but then those movie had nowhere near this kind of budget, so I understand why.

Overall, I want to write a tiny bit about the prequel trilogy as a whole, based on what I’ve noticed online.

When these movies first came out, and in the years later (early 2010’s) it was really cool to shit on them, the more shit you could throw at them, the more popular you became. But I’m starting to notice a trend where there are people like myself, who grew up with these films and can love them for what they are. I don’t think objectively anybody can say these are better than the original trilogy. These movies wanted to be different, were allowed to be different, more effects driven, as that technology became available and George Lucas went wild with them. And now, especially since the “sequel trilogy” has finished, and we now know the “full story”, more people are “coming out” with their love for the prequels where yes, they have their weaknesses, but over the three movies, they tell you a full story, that has a beginning, middle and end. Myself, I’m still wrestling with the entire Episode XI as that movie… you know what? You will read it soon. 🙂

All I’m trying to say is, if it’s been a while since you’ve seen these movies, give them a chance now. Is Jar Jar still there? Yes, unfortunately. But maybe you will find that they have more redeemable qualities than you thought.

That’s all for the prequels! Onto the “sequel” trilogy we go! What did you think? Let me know!

Until next time,

Luke

Attack of the Clones is my favourite prequel. There, I said it. Yes, I am ashamed. Yes, I am perfectly sane. Really. No, really I am.

The story picks up 10 years after Star Wars: Episode I – The Phantom Menace, where we get grown up Anakin Skywalker played by Hayden Christensen and if there is anything or anyone more hated from these prequels beside Jar Jar Binks, it’s definitely Hayden. And look… his performance in this movie is bad, I can’t defend that. I think he gets better in the last one, but I will keep it for that review. But I honestly can’t blame him, and I’ll give you two reasons why:

1. I have seen him in really under-seen movie Shattered Glass, where he gets to play an interesting character really well (and he’s made it in between the Star Wars movies, just FYI) and because of that I know he’s got something in him, if you know how to direct him. Which brings me to my second point…
2. Show me somebody in this movie that gives GREAT performance. I adore actors like Ewan McGregor and Natalie Portman but even these two talented actors, who shine in other movies, feel just… fine in here. I think an argument could be made here, that plenty of people focused on Hayden’s performance almost exclusively, as he’s given most of the screen time. And as people were disappointed with this movie, he was the easiest one to point the fingers at. I believe we should talk more about Lucas’s “direction”, as (especially in the third episode where he basically undoes everything that made Natalie’s character interesting) he can’t really work with new (?) actors… Also, from another actors it’s quite clear most of the actors were in a green screen studio, reacting to nothing, given minimum directions, so there is that…

The story is intriguing as we can see the “rise” of Stormtroopers, start of the “Clone Wars” that were referenced in Episode IV, count Dooku (all hail Christopher Lee!) and most importantly, the big arena Jedi fight near the end.

That might be the main reason why this is my favourite out of the prequels – until then, we’ve not seen anything like that, where plethora (what a big word!) of Jedi Knights are going up against droids in one arena, where Mace Windu for the first time ever introduces different lightsaber colour than blue, green or red (and purple is definitely my favourite lightsaber colour). Still my favourite scene of the entire prequel trilogy.

Of course, we can’t forget to please the fans, so here’s where Jango Fett (father of Boba Fett) is introduced and killed, this is where, for the very first time, we see Yoda actually go toe-to-toe with somebody and it’s pretty cool, and we also take a peak at the early plans of the ultimate weapon (aka Death Star).

This is what I meant in my previous review for Phantom Menace – Lucas had a vision and plan, therefore he actually planted plenty of tiny easter eggs throughout the entire prequel trilogy, so I do admire that. Still wish he would let somebody else to “play” with him on these, somebody he would actually listen to, and most importantly, somebody who wouldn’t be afraid to tell him “look George, are you sure about this, and this, and this…?”

Objectively, this movie is around 3*, maybe slightly lower, but again, it’s Star Wars. And it’s something I grew up on, so for me it’s easier to ignore the stuff I don’t like, and enjoy the stuff I really like. It’s alright if you don’t agree with me.

That’s all for this one! Which of these did you enjoy/hate more? Let me know!

Until next time,

Luke

So, this is where to “fun” starts. I have so many conflicting thoughts, about this particular movie, I will definitely have to use two ratings, as I can’t do it any other way. But let’s start from the beginning, shall we? (words uttered by George Lucas in late 90’s).

Unlike most Star Wars fans, I grew up watching the originals alongside the prequels (born in 1991) so I was introduced to both of them almost simultaneously. And even as a kid, not knowing anything about cinema, the cult status Star Wars had established over the 20 years (again, we are in the 90’s, the Internet wasn’t THE thing yet and I couldn’t understand English) I could tell the movies felt differently, and not just “the old ones looked worse, the new ones looked better” way. There was something about the prequels I couldn’t place. I think I do get it now – these are all sole responsibility of George Lucas, whereas the original trilogy had different writers/directors. And as much I admire George for everything he’s done, he should’ve had somebody else take a look at the script, as that’s by far the weakest part of this movie. Some things you can’t deny from the prequels, they enriched the Star Wars universe with new, diverse planets, characters and they had a plan for what the trilogy will be about. It’s honestly shame Lucas felt he could do everything by himself.

I still remember watching The Phantom Menace for the first time, it was in my grandma’s “cabin close to the woods” (just to explain – it’s fairly common for Czech people to have tiny cabins/houses someplace close to a nature where one would go for a weekend, or week’s holiday. Most of the time, these are really not fancy at all, as the point would be to have as little technology there as possible, to “unplug” from the world for a bit and go back to the nature) on her tiny, black and white 10″ TV (that’s right, my very first time watching this movie was in black and white on a really tiny TV). Since there was a gathering of neighbours, I couldn’t really enjoy the movie as much, but I knew it’s being recorded at home on… VHS (oh yeah, that’s how old I am) so I was looking forward to that. Then I watched it at home properly and liked it. Not as much as the originals, but I did like it.

Over the years I’ve seen the prequel trilogy (including this one) plenty of times, last time it was about 3 weeks prior, on Disney+. And yes, the contrast between the original Star Wars and this one is huge, but I honestly believe that’s because George wanted it like that. The problem here is, did it work…? This is where I’m conflicted – I feel like even though some parts of this might be laughable (obviously Jar Jar is annoying, but I’ve never hated him as much as 90% of the Internet) as a whole, the movie somehow works. The story flows, it doesn’t feel bloated, and even though it’s almost 2 hours and 20 minutes, it goes by quickly, which is definitely plus.

And this is (probably) where my personal bias comes in (oh hello, old friend) I grew up with these movies, the same way some people in the 80’s grew up with the original trilogy. I can’t blame people who hate the prequels, as they are totally different to the thing they grew up loving, but at the same time, I can’t join those people, as they are not that bad. Looking back at them now, every episode has something in them that elevates it and adds something to the Star Wars universe, this one had given us probably the most bad-ass Star Wars piece of soundtrack ever composed, listen for yourself:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZTg6hg1miFg

Yes, I know that’s a bold statement to make given the rich history of Star Wars music, but I stand by it (I’m very, very brave). Also the lightsaber fight between Qui-Gon Jinn, Obi-Wan and Darth Maul is great, even though the finish might be slightly anticlimactic. I’m also in the group of people who likes the pod-racing sequence.

While re-watching all 9 episodes of “Skywalker Saga”, something occurred to me – you can say anything you want about the prequels, but one thing you can’t say is that George Lucas didn’t have it planned out. He knew exactly what he wanted to make, what story he wanted to tell over the course of these three movies, and that’s a really big plus with every trilogy (looking at you, sequels). Did he succeed on every level? Does that excuse Jar Jar? Does that give him a permission to change the original movies as much as he has? No, no and no. It’s up to you, to judge that.

The objective rating of this would probably be around 3*, but this is Star Wars. And even this one (which for me is the weakest one of the prequels) still holds a special place in my heart. Please don’t kill me for that. Just for the record, I am not putting the prequels anywhere close to the originals, as they are untouchable. I like them in their own way.

This is all for this one? How much you disagree with me on this? Maybe don’t let me know this time 🙂 Just kidding, please do.

Until next time,

Luke